This is Not a Holiday

Travel Tales for the Third-World Realist

  • HOME

  • ABOUT

  • BOOKS

  • FILMS

  • ARTICLES

  • BLOG

  • CONTACT

  • More

    Point It by Dieter Graf

    [Short of time? Read the Haiku review instead]

    Everything I ever heard about travelling in Japan indicated that most of the population wouldn’t speak English. Any why should they? This is a nation that invented the Tamagotchi – a toy that dies if you don’t look after it. A children’s toy designed to die! They’re hardly going to worry about lactose intolerant foreigners eating the wrong type of cheese.

    I like a challenge. I like not knowing what is going on around me, trying to pick the mystery ingredient in the soup, and guessing what people are trying to tell me (unless they have a rifle and are shouting angrily in my face). There is one potential scenario which terrifies me though – accidentally being served seafood, especially in an island nation famous for its willingness to eat anything without lungs. Am I allergic to crustaceans? Will my head explode if a red snapper touches my lips? Well, no. The reason I don’t want to eat seafood is that I don’t like the taste, and I was so worried that I wouldn’t be able to ascertain the fishiness of any given meal that I sought out the classic picture dictionary – Point it, by Dieter Graf.

    I’m pretty good with languages. I remember enough school French to survive; I learnt passable Spanish on the road in Latin America; I have enjoyed impressing the locals with my quick-build Swahili vocabulary, and my Afrikaans is rusty, but functional. I estimate that I could tolerably converse with just under 25% of the world’s population, but learning Japanese for a two-week visit seemed an inefficient use of my time, so I bought the book instead.

    With sales of around 2,000,000 copies, Point it is an idea. A brilliant idea, by a German. Never again will anyone have to learn the Tagalog word for ‘grapefruit’ (except probably Filipino fruiterers); simply find the picture on page 5 and Point it! No need to mime roller blading or draw a bull’s spleen – just Point it! You can still mime arterial spray though, as that’s lots of fun and there is no relevant picture. Food, transport, emergency services – shots of every conceivable travel necessity are included, and plenty that are inconceivable.

    And so, in the fullness of time, I journeyed to Japan with my amazing little book, ready to point my way across Honshu watching eager little Japanese eyes light up with understanding on production of a picture of a chicken. The rumours were true – English speakers were few and far between, and the food was mysterious and hard to reverse engineer. And yet, as I always have done, I got by. I mimed, I tasted, I pointed and mispronounced. The people are kind and patient, and so comprehensive is the unobtrusive signage, in Japanese and English, that it’s hard to get lost. Like flower arranging, they have the positioning of street furniture down to an art.

    I neglected my book until I virtually forgot its presence. The slim volume fits well into most pockets yet when I did need it, I couldn’t find it. It was usually lying back in my room. The one occasion I recall opening it, trying to buy a packet of tissues in Kyoto, I couldn’t for the life of me find the appropriate image (page 48, bottom right) and swiftly gave up in embarrassment.

    I must conclude that, like in any other country, I am able to get by without the book. My trip remained seafood-free, except on one occasion when my okonomiyaki was sprinkled with tuna flakes and I nearly vomited all over the chef’s hotplate. However, I still believe Point it to be a great idea, and I will save my volume for when I journey across China one day. I am determined to use the picture of a white girl showering in a g-string in the correct context.

    Tags:

    • point it
    • dieter graf
    • tamagotchi
    • japan
    • swahili
    • afrikaans
    • tagalog
    • kyoto
    • g-string
    Featured Posts
    Tyres, Trucks & Tarmac: The premiere

    Tyres, Trucks & Tarmac: The premiere

    An Interview with Dan Slater, The Trail Running Mastermind Behind The NUTR.

    An Interview with Dan Slater, The Trail Running Mastermind Behind The NUTR.

    Sea to Summit Waterproof Phone Case

    Sea to Summit Waterproof Phone Case

    Ruffwear Grip Trex

    Ruffwear Grip Trex

    Lifeventure Travel Ear Plugs

    Lifeventure Travel Ear Plugs

    Packtowl Ultralite Travel Towel

    Packtowl Ultralite Travel Towel

    Bose QC15 Headphones

    Bose QC15 Headphones

    This is NOT a Holiday - Dan Slater

    This is NOT a Holiday - Dan Slater

    Short film - the NZ tour training weekend.

    New Edition out now!

    New Edition out now!

    {"items":["5f6bf5b3916c26001763e43b","5f6bf5b3916c26001763e440","5f6bf5b3916c26001763e444","5f6bf5b36c382100170192d6","5f6bf5b36c382100170192d7","5f6bf5b36c382100170192da","5f6bf5b36c382100170192dc","5f6bf5b36c382100170192dd","5f6bf5b2a6d2c400186dd8c9","5f6bf5b2a6d2c400186dd8ce"],"styles":{"galleryType":"Strips","groupSize":1,"showArrows":true,"cubeImages":true,"cubeType":"fill","cubeRatio":"100%/100%","isVertical":false,"gallerySize":30,"collageDensity":0.8,"groupTypes":"1","oneRow":true,"imageMargin":0,"galleryMargin":0,"scatter":0,"chooseBestGroup":true,"smartCrop":false,"hasThumbnails":false,"enableScroll":true,"isGrid":false,"isSlider":false,"isColumns":false,"isSlideshow":true,"cropOnlyFill":false,"fixedColumns":1,"enableInfiniteScroll":true,"isRTL":false,"minItemSize":120,"rotatingGroupTypes":"","rotatingCropRatios":"","columnWidths":"","gallerySliderImageRatio":1.7777777777777777,"numberOfImagesPerRow":3,"numberOfImagesPerCol":1,"groupsPerStrip":0,"borderRadius":0,"boxShadow":0,"gridStyle":0,"mobilePanorama":false,"placeGroupsLtr":false,"viewMode":"preview","thumbnailSpacings":4,"galleryThumbnailsAlignment":"bottom","isMasonry":false,"isAutoSlideshow":true,"slideshowLoop":false,"autoSlideshowInterval":3,"bottomInfoHeight":0,"titlePlacement":"SHOW_ON_HOVER","galleryTextAlign":"center","scrollSnap":true,"itemClick":"nothing","fullscreen":true,"videoPlay":"hover","scrollAnimation":"NO_EFFECT","slideAnimation":"SCROLL","scrollDirection":1,"scrollDuration":400,"overlayAnimation":"FADE_IN","arrowsPosition":0,"arrowsSize":18,"watermarkOpacity":40,"watermarkSize":40,"useWatermark":true,"watermarkDock":{"top":"auto","left":"auto","right":0,"bottom":0,"transform":"translate3d(0,0,0)"},"loadMoreAmount":"all","defaultShowInfoExpand":1,"allowLinkExpand":true,"expandInfoPosition":0,"allowFullscreenExpand":true,"fullscreenLoop":false,"galleryAlignExpand":"left","addToCartBorderWidth":1,"addToCartButtonText":"","slideshowInfoSize":160,"playButtonForAutoSlideShow":false,"allowSlideshowCounter":false,"hoveringBehaviour":"NEVER_SHOW","thumbnailSize":120,"magicLayoutSeed":1,"imageHoverAnimation":"NO_EFFECT","imagePlacementAnimation":"NO_EFFECT","calculateTextBoxWidthMode":"PERCENT","textBoxHeight":0,"textBoxWidth":200,"textBoxWidthPercent":50,"textImageSpace":10,"textBoxBorderRadius":0,"textBoxBorderWidth":0,"loadMoreButtonText":"","loadMoreButtonBorderWidth":1,"loadMoreButtonBorderRadius":0,"imageInfoType":"ATTACHED_BACKGROUND","itemBorderWidth":0,"itemBorderRadius":0,"itemEnableShadow":false,"itemShadowBlur":20,"itemShadowDirection":135,"itemShadowSize":10,"imageLoadingMode":"BLUR","expandAnimation":"NO_EFFECT","imageQuality":90,"usmToggle":false,"usm_a":0,"usm_r":0,"usm_t":0,"videoSound":false,"videoSpeed":"1","videoLoop":true,"gallerySizeType":"px","gallerySizePx":220,"allowTitle":true,"allowContextMenu":true,"textsHorizontalPadding":-30,"showVideoPlayButton":true,"galleryLayout":5,"targetItemSize":220,"selectedLayout":"5|bottom|1|fill|false|1|true","layoutsVersion":2,"selectedLayoutV2":5,"isSlideshowFont":true,"externalInfoHeight":0,"externalInfoWidth":0},"container":{"width":220,"height":284,"galleryWidth":220,"galleryHeight":123,"scrollBase":0}}
    Recent Posts
    Escape to Coronaville

    Escape to Coronaville

    West Side Boys Story

    West Side Boys Story

    Halftime Report

    Halftime Report

    Race to Dakar

    Race to Dakar

    How the Hell did I get Here?

    How the Hell did I get Here?

    {"items":["5f6bf5b3f4cf3700184ea5e9","5f6bf5b3f4cf3700184ea5ea","5f6bf5b3f4cf3700184ea5eb","5f6bf5b3f4cf3700184ea5ec","5f6bf5b3f4cf3700184ea5ed"],"styles":{"galleryType":"Columns","groupSize":1,"showArrows":true,"cubeImages":true,"cubeType":"max","cubeRatio":1.7777777777777777,"isVertical":true,"gallerySize":30,"collageAmount":0,"collageDensity":0,"groupTypes":"1","oneRow":false,"imageMargin":22,"galleryMargin":0,"scatter":0,"chooseBestGroup":true,"smartCrop":false,"hasThumbnails":false,"enableScroll":true,"isGrid":true,"isSlider":false,"isColumns":false,"isSlideshow":false,"cropOnlyFill":false,"fixedColumns":0,"enableInfiniteScroll":true,"isRTL":false,"minItemSize":50,"rotatingGroupTypes":"","rotatingCropRatios":"","columnWidths":"","gallerySliderImageRatio":1.7777777777777777,"numberOfImagesPerRow":3,"numberOfImagesPerCol":1,"groupsPerStrip":0,"borderRadius":0,"boxShadow":0,"gridStyle":0,"mobilePanorama":false,"placeGroupsLtr":false,"viewMode":"preview","thumbnailSpacings":4,"galleryThumbnailsAlignment":"bottom","isMasonry":false,"isAutoSlideshow":false,"slideshowLoop":false,"autoSlideshowInterval":4,"bottomInfoHeight":0,"titlePlacement":["SHOW_ON_THE_RIGHT","SHOW_BELOW"],"galleryTextAlign":"center","scrollSnap":false,"itemClick":"nothing","fullscreen":true,"videoPlay":"hover","scrollAnimation":"NO_EFFECT","slideAnimation":"SCROLL","scrollDirection":0,"scrollDuration":400,"overlayAnimation":"FADE_IN","arrowsPosition":0,"arrowsSize":23,"watermarkOpacity":40,"watermarkSize":40,"useWatermark":true,"watermarkDock":{"top":"auto","left":"auto","right":0,"bottom":0,"transform":"translate3d(0,0,0)"},"loadMoreAmount":"all","defaultShowInfoExpand":1,"allowLinkExpand":true,"expandInfoPosition":0,"allowFullscreenExpand":true,"fullscreenLoop":false,"galleryAlignExpand":"left","addToCartBorderWidth":1,"addToCartButtonText":"","slideshowInfoSize":200,"playButtonForAutoSlideShow":false,"allowSlideshowCounter":false,"hoveringBehaviour":"NEVER_SHOW","thumbnailSize":120,"magicLayoutSeed":1,"imageHoverAnimation":"NO_EFFECT","imagePlacementAnimation":"NO_EFFECT","calculateTextBoxWidthMode":"PERCENT","textBoxHeight":60,"textBoxWidth":200,"textBoxWidthPercent":75,"textImageSpace":10,"textBoxBorderRadius":0,"textBoxBorderWidth":0,"loadMoreButtonText":"","loadMoreButtonBorderWidth":1,"loadMoreButtonBorderRadius":0,"imageInfoType":"ATTACHED_BACKGROUND","itemBorderWidth":0,"itemBorderRadius":0,"itemEnableShadow":false,"itemShadowBlur":20,"itemShadowDirection":135,"itemShadowSize":10,"imageLoadingMode":"BLUR","expandAnimation":"NO_EFFECT","imageQuality":90,"usmToggle":false,"usm_a":0,"usm_r":0,"usm_t":0,"videoSound":false,"videoSpeed":"1","videoLoop":true,"gallerySizeType":"px","gallerySizePx":1000,"allowTitle":true,"allowContextMenu":true,"textsHorizontalPadding":-30,"itemBorderColor":{"themeName":"color_12","value":"rgba(113,113,113,0)"},"showVideoPlayButton":true,"galleryLayout":2,"calculateTextBoxHeightMode":"MANUAL","targetItemSize":1000,"selectedLayout":"2|bottom|1|max|true|0|true","layoutsVersion":2,"selectedLayoutV2":2,"isSlideshowFont":true,"externalInfoHeight":60,"externalInfoWidth":0.75},"container":{"width":220,"galleryWidth":242,"galleryHeight":0,"scrollBase":0,"height":null}}
    Archive
    • March 2020 (1)
    • February 2020 (1)
    • January 2020 (1)
    • December 2019 (2)
    • November 2019 (1)
    • July 2018 (1)
    • December 2016 (1)
    • October 2016 (1)
    • September 2016 (2)
    • August 2016 (1)
    • July 2016 (1)
    • June 2016 (1)
    • May 2016 (1)
    • March 2016 (2)
    • February 2016 (1)
    • January 2016 (1)
    • November 2015 (1)
    • October 2015 (1)
    • September 2015 (3)
    • July 2015 (1)
    • June 2015 (1)
    • May 2015 (2)
    • April 2015 (1)
    • March 2015 (2)
    • February 2015 (1)
    • January 2015 (3)
    • December 2014 (2)
    • August 2014 (1)
    • July 2014 (1)
    • December 2013 (1)
    • October 2013 (1)
    • September 2013 (1)
    • August 2013 (2)
    • July 2013 (2)
    • June 2013 (2)
    • May 2013 (2)
    • April 2013 (3)
    • March 2013 (2)
    • February 2013 (2)
    • January 2013 (2)
    • December 2012 (2)
    • November 2012 (2)
    • October 2012 (2)
    • September 2012 (3)
    • August 2012 (1)

    © 2014 by Dan Slater

    Follow Us